Solid Hearts, Steel Backbones: A Shoutout to the Real Ones

- by DeAnna

Being a prison wife isn't for the weak — let’s just get that out there right now.

We don’t choose this life because it’s easy, glamorous, or something we dreamt of growing up. We choose it because love showed up, and it didn’t come with a convenient timeline or a perfect package. It came real, raw, and wrapped in barbed wire — and we said yes anyway.

Because that's what loyalty actually looks like.

While the world screams “walk away,” we show up — day after day — holding down the damn fort with nothing but our own strength, a whole lot of love, and maybe a good cry in the bathroom when no one’s watching. We do this through 30-minute calls that cut off mid-sentence. We do it through letters written with hope and pain inked on the same page. Through visits where the touch is limited, but the connection? Untouchable.

We wipe our own tears. We build them up when they’re breaking down. We speak life into them when the world around them is trying to kill their spirit. We send strength in envelopes and wrap our prayers around them like armor.

People love to label us as “naïve” — as if love has to follow a script they approve of. But this isn’t naivety. This is the kind of ride-or-die loyalty that most people couldn’t even spell, let alone understand. Loyalty when it’s inconvenient. Loyalty when it’s hard. Loyalty when no one else claps for it.

If you’re living this life, then you already know — you’re part of a sisterhood that moves in silence but loves with the volume cranked up all the way. We might be quiet out here, but don’t ever confuse that with weakness. We are warriors in lip gloss and hoodies. We carry weight most people wouldn’t survive.

So shoutout to the real ones.

To the women who keep answering those calls, who keep showing up for visitation day with butterflies and a bag of quarters, who write “I love you” a thousand different ways without ever needing the words back. To the women who said I got you — and meant it. This one's for you.

We stay solid. We stay true. And no, we’re not alone — not now, not ever.