The Truth About Prison Relationships

by Ryan

People love to say things like:

“She’ll move on.” “It’s not real love.” “He’s just using her.” “She’s wasting her life.”

Let me be clear: They don’t know a damn thing about prison relationships.

They don’t know what it’s like to hold onto love through walls, wire, and years. They don’t know what it’s like to fall asleep wondering if she’s okay and wake up praying she hasn’t given up on you yet.

They don’t know what it takes for a woman to stay committed to a man society already threw away. And they sure as hell don’t know what it’s like to love someone you can’t touch, can’t hold, can’t protect—but still fight for every single day.

My relationship isn't built on physical closeness. It’s built on trust. On pain. On redemption. On showing up for each other through letters, through phone calls, through the worst days of our lives.

And let me say this loud and clear: She didn’t wait on me. She stood up for me. When I couldn’t speak, she spoke. When I couldn’t be free, she moved like I already was. And when the system tried to erase me, she wrote my name louder.

This isn’t just some jailhouse romance. This is survival. This is spiritual warfare. This is what it looks like when two people refuse to let distance kill their bond.

People on the outside think we’re foolish. They think she deserves better. They think I’ll never change. And maybe they’d be right—if they knew the version of me from back then.

But they don’t know the version I’ve become because of her.

She calls me out when I slip. She lifts me up when I drown. She reminds me every day that I’m still worth loving—even in a place designed to make me forget that.

Yeah, prison relationships are hard. But they’re also real. Raw. Sacred. You can’t fake this kind of loyalty. You can’t manufacture this kind of love.

So the next time someone wants to talk shit about prison love, tell them this:

Only a strong woman can love a man behind bars without losing herself. And only a real man will take that love and build himself into someone worthy of it.

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