Skip to main content

Just Because You Haven’t Heard from Me…

 

-by Ryan

It’s been a minute, I know.

Some of y’all probably thought I disappeared, went dark, or gave up.
Nah.

I’ve just been fighting battles that don’t come with warning shots.
I’ve been surviving behind walls that don’t care about progress.
And I’ve been silenced in every way they know how to silence a man without a noose.

But I’m still here.

Still breathing.
Still pissed off.
Still holding onto a sliver of something that looks like hope.

When you’re in this place long enough, you start learning the difference between “quiet” and “forgotten.”
I’ve been both.
But I’m not gonna be either anymore.

The truth is, they don’t like men like me talking.
Not because I’m violent. Not because I’m a threat.
But because I’m waking up.
Because I see through the bullshit.

Because I’m the kind of inmate that doesn’t just want out—I want change.

And that? That’s dangerous.

Since my last blog, they’ve sent me to max. Again.
Because of lies. Because of labels. Because of a file someone padded with fiction and fear.

It’s been almost ten years to the day since I first walked into a max yard as a 17-year-old kid.
Now here I am, 26, just days from 27, and I’m being branded all over again.
Not for something I did, but for something they say I am.

A shot-caller. A gang head. A threat.
Funny how you can say “I’m not affiliated” till you’re blue in the face, sign papers saying the same, and they’ll still decide who you are for you.

That’s how it works in here.

Your words don’t matter.
Your actions? Irrelevant.
All that matters is what looks good in their report.
What fits their narrative.
What keeps their power protected.

They say prison is about rehabilitation.
That’s bullshit and barbed wire.

This isn’t about correction.
It’s about control.

But here’s the part they didn’t plan for:

I’m still telling my story.
From the hole. From max. From the concrete floor where they hoped I’d break.
And I’ll keep telling it, because silence is what lets them win.

So no, I haven’t posted in a while.
But don’t mistake the pause for surrender.

I’ve been in the storm, collecting fuel.
And I’m still here.
Still writing.
Still changing.

For me.
For my wife.
For every single one of you who’s ever felt voiceless, labeled, or buried alive in a system built to forget you.

Let this be the reminder:

Just because you haven’t heard from me… doesn’t mean I’m not coming back louder.


#BehindBarsUnfiltered #StillStanding #StillFighting #MaxSecurityMindset #TruthBehindBars

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Exposing the Deadly Reality at La Palma Correctional Facility: How Many More Have to Die?

For years, La Palma Correctional Facility in Eloy, Arizona, has been a hotspot for controversy, yet little has been done to address the rampant corruption, officer misconduct, and systemic failures that have turned it into a living hell for those incarcerated within its walls. Most recently, another inmate has died—one of many whose deaths could have been prevented if those in charge had taken real action instead of covering up their negligence. On January 2, 2025, I fought to have my husband moved out of La Palma due to the sheer volume of drugs flooding the yard, which were being brought in by correctional officers. I reported specific names to the Special Security Unit (SSU), thinking that doing the right thing would bring change. Instead, my concerns fell on deaf ears. Now, here we are, with more inmates losing their lives—many of these deaths are suspected overdoses, yet little to no investigation ever seems to result in actual change. A History of Negligence and Deaths This lates...

The Beating You Weren’t Supposed to See: A Former AZDOC Officer Speaks Out

  Let me tell you something right now — that viral 3-minute video Fox 10 Phoenix aired last week? That wasn’t the whole story. That was just the tip of the blood-soaked iceberg. As a former Arizona Department of Corrections Officer, I know exactly what you're looking at in that video. You’re seeing the tail end of a brutal, calculated beatdown that started long before the cameras started rolling. That inmate? He’d already been dragged, pummeled, and bled out — by the time he was being chased down the entire length of the prison yard like a damn scene out of a gladiator movie. Fox 10’s report referred to it as a fight that “spilled out into the prison yard.” SPILLED OUT? Like someone knocked over a soda. No — this wasn’t some spontaneous scuffle. That man was hunted . Let’s Break Down the Bullsh*t Donna Hamm’s Comment: “The inmates are running the asylum, and that's not what the taxpayers in Arizona are paying for.” Newsflash: the inmates have always run the yard. Th...

Inside the Lewis Bachman Unit: A Call for Reform

The Lewis Prison Complex, located in Buckeye, Arizona, comprises eight units, including the Bachman Unit, where my husband is currently incarcerated. This unit houses inmates under protective custody, ranging from minimum to medium security levels, with a capacity of 752 inmates across four dormitory-style buildings. ( corrections.az.gov ) Systemic Issues Plaguing the Facility Over the years, the Lewis Complex has been marred by numerous incidents that highlight systemic issues within its walls: Contraband Infiltration: In January 2025, a correctional officer named Berman Comon was arrested for allegedly smuggling drugs and contraband cellphones into the Rast Unit of Lewis Prison. Comon, who had served as a counselor for 11 years, reportedly received $5,000 per trip to bring in the illicit items. ( abc15.com ) Inmate Unrest: In November 2018, surveillance footage revealed inmates in the Rast Max Unit setting fires outside their cells, leading to the evacuation of the entire unit. Thi...